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| latest reviews... | |
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| Topic Started: Jun 8 2009, 03:50 PM (553 Views) | |
| Post #16 Jul 22 2009, 01:47 AM | Joe E. Holman |
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And Harry Potter and the Half-blood Prince... http://www.holmansmoviereview.com/2009/07/harry-potter-and-half-baked-piece-of.html |
 
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| Post #17 Jul 25 2009, 04:11 AM | Bonzolee |
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So, here's my half assed opinion on the new Transformers that I was supposed to post weeks ago. Did it suck? Did it bore me? Did it give me a headache? No. Was it incredible? No. Was it exactly what I expected? Yes. The plot and character development was seriously lacking, but the action sequences were fun; they were something different, and it was interesting to watch all the giant robots duke it out. Also, I liked the sweeping feel of the movie– you have fights in the city, forest, desert, and near pyramids. The comedy was corny as hell (though I found some of it to be fine), but it wasn't bad enough to cause me to vomit or anything. Mostly, I was looking for some light story and mindless action when I walked into the theatre, and that's exactly what I got. So, while the comedy and story plunged into embarrassment territory, it really didn't bother me. I wasn't interested in a movie with a strong story. I wanted to see epic robot battles. That's why I bought the fuckin' ticket! And I enjoyed that part of the film very much. Hell, I'd watch it again. The original score kicked major amounts of ass and I dug the main attraction of the film: the robot battles. Really, the film delivered for me. It gave me exactly what I expected. Of course, my friends were all pretty split on the film. Some of them fucking hated it, some of them loved it. My friend who is attending college for film thought the story was shit but was impressed by how the action scenes were done (especially enjoyed the forest scene). From that perspective he thought it was great; from a writing standpoint... epic failure. That's pretty close to my viewpoint. The story wasn't horrible enough to kill the action, and if it was, it was glossed up so well that it didn't get to me. I liked this movie better than the recent X-Men actually, which had a lot of potential but found a way to ruin it all. That movie disappointed me big time. I was fine with the new Star Trek (although it was kind of an odd, one off thing wasn't it? Shallow, too). I enjoyed it enough. I've been disappointed with a ton of films this year, and Transformers wasn't one of them. I had fun; sure, the movie was kind of pointless and all, but it did pointless in an excellent way. That said, I almost lost my shit over the creators' constant need to play that new Green Day theme. Fuck that. The solo stole the fuckin' Full House melody! Has no one else noticed this? (listen to 3:16) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sSur5X022jE "Everywhere you look , everywhere you go".... Then the credits pop up and guess what? The fucking song is back! With so much great original material, why did they waste so much time with outside songs? I'll say this: there is NO fuckin' way in hell that the new Green Day album is better than the Transformers film! If you want to be punk, I suggest you find a more "badass" melody to steal than the "Full House" theme. Charles Manson playing Candyland is the most "hardcore" thing in the world compared to that shit. Ultimately, Transformers is going to be one of those films that we all look back on 10 years from now and laugh. It's not the least bit timeless, but I had fun at the time. Really, it was like a lot of my dates. |
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"Brain disorders, like madness, are themselves contagious. The frequency of madness among doctors who are specialists for the mad is notorious." – Gustave Le Bon "The fact that audiences would rather go to Wonderland than face Iraq speaks volumes." – Random Youtube Poster | |
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| Post #18 Jul 26 2009, 01:09 AM | Dan |
Holy shit. Your totally right. |
 
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| We are dumb all over | |
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| Post #19 Jul 26 2009, 07:22 AM | Joe E. Holman |
Bonzo, you're quite a man. But here's the thing; you're the type of dude I call an "ice cream eater." That makes no sense except in my mind, and so I'll try and explain it better--you're the type of guy who just rolls in mediocrity. You enjoy everything to an extent. It is your type of writer that makes up many a product review on the internet. Nothing wrong with that...little of this, little of that...the problem is, reviews are almost no good to you because your distinctive tastes and moods and adaptations will always work out something uniquely enjoyable for you. Just another little bowl of ice cream while everyone else is having one. When I'm critiquing a movie, I want to stay in touch with the large audience and hit as many people as I can. In this case, I agreed with the overwhelming majority of critics who thought it was dog shit, and it was.
How can you enjoy fight scenes when everything else about the movie was wrong? That, like the 2007 movie, was an insult to what Transformers stood for. It's funny you mention that though. The other day, I was listening to three 18 year olds talks about how cool the fighting was. But to me, your mind has to operate like a kid's to appreciate just fighting. This or that move may be cool, but fucking pyramids??? Why was that cool? It was ridiculous.
Mindless action??? Why? It's Transformers. You want a good, memorable story as well. Why do you settle for non-serious BS like this?
What? So it's ok to have a teen-based Star Trek that totally rapes the plot of the originals and has Kirk marooned on a planet because Spock gets pissed? Did you read my review of it? How about the car scene? Was that cool too?
I didn't see what you meant here. Yes, there are similarities, but had you not made the connection for me, I never would have associated that with the Green Day (which I hadn't heard till now). Edited by Joe E. Holman, Jul 26 2009, 07:24 AM.
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| Post #20 Jul 27 2009, 04:07 AM | Bonzolee |
Joe, I'm going to eventually type more but I'm about to get some shut eye. Took some Tylenol PM not too long ago and it's kicking in big time. While I wait for it to knock me out completely, I'll just address two things.
OK, so I'm reading this for like, the fourth time and I'm starting to understand it. Maybe it's the Tylenol PM! First, what do you mean by "product reviews"? Like, reviews of cd players, TV sets, and dryers? Or music, movies, books, and the like? And, or these like "official" reviews or just short opinions? Really, could you explain this whole thing a bit further? Still not getting the "ice cream eater" bit.
Same melody for the first few combos of notes, man– same exact melody; the first dozen or so notes follow the "Full House" theme. That's too many damn notes! There is only one difference: in the Green Day solo, the notes can be divided by two. It's standard, "one-and-two-and-three-and-four-and-one". That's the time the song is in. The "Full House" theme, if I remember correctly, is done in triplets. "One-trip-let-two-trip-let-....". That's the foundational groove behind the music. Many times, you'll hear the emphasis placed on the "1..-let-2...-let-3...." swing; like, "Hot For Teacher" by Van Halen, for instance. The double kick drum rhythm is playing that swing pattern. Hear it? Like, "Where Eagles Dare" by Iron Maiden is in triplets. Try to feel the triplet pulse in the song. "Living After Midnight" by Judas Priest, on the other hand, is in your standard "1-and-2-and...." pattern. Listen to the hi-hats in the Priest tune. They are playing straight, equal notes– all divisible by two. Now, let's get back to the Green Day song and the theme to "Full House". Take away the difference in grooves, and the melody is the same. See? Well... I guess "hear" would be the more appropriate word, huh? |
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"Brain disorders, like madness, are themselves contagious. The frequency of madness among doctors who are specialists for the mad is notorious." – Gustave Le Bon "The fact that audiences would rather go to Wonderland than face Iraq speaks volumes." – Random Youtube Poster | |
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| Post #21 Aug 1 2009, 08:14 AM | Joe E. Holman |
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Ice Age 3... http://www.holmansmoviereview.com/2009/08/something-else-to-put-on-ice.html Meh! |
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| Post #22 Aug 3 2009, 08:37 AM | Joe E. Holman |
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And G-Force... http://www.holmansmoviereview.com/2009/08/g-whizzforce.html |
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| Post #23 Aug 5 2009, 07:16 PM | Joe E. Holman |
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And Funny People... http://www.holmansmoviereview.com/2009/08/when-comedians-get-serious.html |
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| Post #24 Aug 7 2009, 08:27 AM | Joe E. Holman |
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And Aliens in the Attic... http://www.holmansmoviereview.com/2009/08/stopped-by-wood.html |
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| Post #25 Dec 23 2009, 11:08 AM | Joe E. Holman |
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Got to see Avatar. Here's the review... http://www.holmansmoviereview.com/2009/12/james-cameron-struts-his-stuff-in.html Great film. I walked away feeling like my abysmal reality that I cherish so much is so limited. We are beings who forget so easily where we come from and the forces that made us. I had an appreciation for this planet even more coming out than when I went it. Can't be called a flop, that's for sure. |
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4:48 PM Jul 31
