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| Jesus Lost the Election; True Story. Happened today! | |
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| Topic Started: Jan 5 2009, 07:34 PM (307 Views) | |
| Post #1 Jan 5 2009, 07:34 PM | Dane Eidson |
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This is a true story. Really it is true! And by chance I was at the right place at the right time to witness this classic in the making! I walked into a place of business. I happened upon a fundie witnessing to a man from a foreign country. The out of touch home missionary was telling the visitor how much he needed Jesus. What was said in reply was a classic. The visitor from overseas responded by sharing with the small town preacher of his bad circumstances dealt to him at the hands of the religious Christian zealots. And to which he ended with, "If Jesus ran for President I would not have voted for him!" I looked at our country's guest and said, "You're alright!" The expression on the fundie's face was in itself classic! |
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| Post #2 Jan 7 2009, 07:51 PM | Joe E. Holman |
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Well, I went off at a cashier tonight for handling money and then getting his fingers inside the styrofoam tray he got for me to take my to-go food in! Damn germ freak, I am! Don't know if that's the same, but thought I'd throw that out there! |
 
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| Post #3 Jan 9 2009, 09:02 PM | Dane Eidson |
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Joe!!!!! That's not being nice! We all know we are supposed to be soft, gentle, mushy, goofy, wierd.....What!!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YNl3Zhiz90 |
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| Post #4 Jan 17 2009, 01:44 AM | Bonzolee |
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Speaking of food, this takes me back to Christmas Eve, maybe 4-6 years ago. Can't really remember. Went out to pick up some Wendy's or something. Some fast food place. Anyway, this dude was 2-3 spots in front of us in line. He was at the very front, and he was waiting for his order. Well, it takes him awhile to get his food, and when he gets it, one of the burgers that wasn't supposed to have cheese had cheese on it. His reaction? He threw it back in the cashier's face and proceded to have a tantrum. He even filled up some of those little cups with ketchup and began randomly throwing them everywhere as he was freaking out. It was LEGEN... wait for it... and I hope you're not lactose intolerant because the next half of that word is... DAIRY! It was truly an epic freak out. It was Christmas Eve, and this guy, dressed in a suit and tie, was losing his goddamn mind. Screaming, cursing, throwing food all over the place. He even put ketchup in the napkin dispenser, smearing it all over the inside. "Other people use those, sir." Finally, some customers tried to get this guy to calm down and told him he was acting like an asshole. His response? He started all over again, blaming the staff for fucking his night up. "Dammit, I just want some goddamn food! That's it. Is that too much to ask for? I want to get the fuck out of here!" Well, he finally got his goddamn food. The woman at the counter played it off great, wishing the guy a merry Christmas, flashing him a warm, broad smile. In fact, a lot of the staff did as this guy left the restaurant, still muttering under his breath. The fact that they were being nice to him was pissing him off even more. When he left, that place was buzzing. Joe, when you say you "went off", exactly how many ballparks away were you from doing what the guy in my story did? He redefined the term that night. The burger throwing was surprising, but what really blew my mind was all the inventive ways he used this ketchup as he continued waiting. I couldn't believer I was seeing that shit. That guy must have had the worst pre-holiday ever. It was probably my favorite Christmas Eve of all time. That guy wound up giving us all a Christmas gift- an awesome story to tell. Edited by Bonzolee, Jan 17 2009, 01:45 AM.
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"Brain disorders, like madness, are themselves contagious. The frequency of madness among doctors who are specialists for the mad is notorious." – Gustave Le Bon "The fact that audiences would rather go to Wonderland than face Iraq speaks volumes." – Random Youtube Poster | |
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4:35 PM Jul 31
